CDC Offers ‘Zombie Preparedness Guide’ But Parents Have Been Living With Baby Zombies Forever!

Babies are little zombies that turn their parents into zombies!

Just in case Nostradamus is right, the CDC has your back!  French philosopher and prophet Michel de Nostradamus reportedly predicted a zombie apocalypse for 2021.  But don’t worry, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention has you covered as they have put out a zombie preparedness tip list.   To be fair, this zombie guide was developed in 2011 as a marketing gimmick, but it still applies.  Here’s your guide!


But wait!  Parents have been living with zombies since the dawn of time!  Why babies, are basically little zombies.

Zombie vs. Baby. The similarities 

Messy head of hair

incomplete set of teeth

constant oral excretions 

speaks in moans and screams

Funky smells are constant  

aggressive appetites

Clumsy, random motor skills, unstable, lurching walk

Messy eaters, no sense of right and wrong

Hell Bent on destruction

Keeps you awake at night in fear

And finally, has the ability to turn others into zombies