In early January we all are promising we’re going to do 100 sit-ups a day, quit smoking, and all the health stuff. Well, let’s look at resolutions we can keep. I promise:

• That if I win the lottery, I will gladly accept the money.
• That I will take all the vacation time that’s coming to me.
• Not to give money to politicians.
• If I can get off jury duty. I promise that I will.
• If someone offers me a cold beer, I’ll smile and say, “Thanks, don’t mind if I do.”
• To leave work every day at the end of my shift.
• When I get my paychecks this year, I’ll cash them promptly.
• I will not deprive myself of my time, just because I feel guilty cause I have children!