Six Medieval Health “Hacks” That Feel Weirdly Like TikTok Trends

Think TikTok health hacks are a little out there? Turns out, people have been trying questionable wellness tips for centuries. Some of these medieval remedies sound like they could easily show up on your “For You” page—minus the goat poop (hopefully).

1. Vinegar Glow-Up ✨

Forget Sephora. Medieval skinfluencers swore by smearing vinegar, flour, and oil on their face for that dewy glow. (Honestly, sounds like a salad dressing gone wrong.)

2. The OG Juice Cleanse 🥤

Why stop at three days when you can detox for a full year? One plan had people sipping a new herb-infused drink every month—ginger, sage, cinnamon. Basically, medieval cold brew.

3. Barley Water 💧

This one still pops up on TikTok today. Boil barley, strain the water, and drink. Medieval texts promised it would help digestion. Cheaper than kombucha, at least.

4. The Vulture Cure-All 🦅

Step one: Catch a vulture. Step two: … nope, we’re out. Medieval “medicine” claimed its bones prevented migraines, eyeballs soothed sore eyes, and feathers could even help induce labour. (Hard pass.)

5. Lizard Locks 🦎

Want flowing hair? According to a 9th-century priest, just burn a lizard, mix the ashes with oil, and massage it into your scalp. Imagine explaining that one to your stylist at First Choice Haircutters.

RELATED: Rubbing Banana Peels on Your Face: Skincare Miracle or Just Another Fad?

6. Goat Poop Potion 💩

From the 11th century: dissolve goat dung in water, strain it, and drink for chest pain. Suddenly, kale smoothies don’t sound so bad.

⚔️ Takeaway: TikTok hacks might be wild, but at least no one’s making you chug goat poop… yet.