Why Moms Are Still Doing Most of the “Brain Work” at Home

In theory, splitting household chores seems simple—"You take out the trash, I’ll clean the bathroom." But there’s an invisible layer of responsibility called the “mental load,” and it turns out that moms carry most of it.

A recent study published in the Journal of Marriage and Family examined 3,000 American households with kids under 18 and uncovered a staggering disparity: 71% of the household “brain work” falls on mothers, compared to just 45% for fathers.

The Two Types of “Brain Work”

Researchers broke down mental labour into two categories:

1. Daily Tasks: These are immediate needs like tracking kids’ schedules, meal planning, and making sure the pantry is stocked. Moms are handling a whopping 79% of this cognitive load—more than double what dads manage (37%).
   
2. Episodic Tasks: These involve less frequent responsibilities like budgeting, home maintenance, or planning for future expenses. While dads take on more of this category (65%), moms still cover 53%, meaning they’re often juggling both day-to-day and long-term mental tasks.

The Double-Up Problem

Interestingly, many parents think they’re both in charge of certain tasks. For example, 61% of moms and 57% of dads reported being primarily responsible for tracking household expenses. This overlap highlights just how messy the division of mental labour can get.

Related: Mothers Spend 97 Hours Weekly on Parenting Tasks — Equivalent to Six-Figure Job!

What About Single Parents?

For solo parents, it’s a different story. Both single moms and single dads handle 100% of the mental load, with single fathers taking on significantly more brain work than partnered dads.

So, what’s the takeaway? The “mental load” isn’t just about dividing chores—it’s about recognizing the cognitive effort that goes into managing a household. If you’re a dad reading this, maybe it’s time to ask your partner, “How can I help ease your mental load?”