Ah, summer. That magical time of year when school’s out, sunscreen’s on, and every mom across the country collectively whispers, “Whose idea was this?”

Sure, we love our kids. But loving them 24/7 for eight straight weeks is... a lot. Here’s a glimpse into what moms are going through while the temperature rises and the patience levels plummet.

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Things All Moms Say All. Summer. Long.

(There is no epidural for summer… so buckle up, buttercup.)

Summer is here, and if you listen closely, you can hear the collective cry of moms echoing across suburban backyards, public splash pads, and every single Canadian Tire parking lot:

"Why are you wet?!"

If you thought childbirth was intense, welcome to summer vacation, where the pain is emotional, the snacks are endless, and the silence is suspicious.

Here are the classic mom-isms you’ll hear on repeat from Victoria Day to Labour Day:

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🔁 “Shut the door, shut the door, shut the door…”

We’re not trying to cool the entire neighbourhood, kids. The A/C bill already has us considering selling a kidney.

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💦 “Why are you wet?”

The options are endless: sprinkler, pool, mystery hose, or the worst-case scenario—no explanation. Bonus round: they're still in their socks.

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🧺 “Hang up your towel!”

And by “hang up,” we don’t mean drape it across the dog or leave it in a wet pile on the stairs. But alas, here we are.

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🎮 “You will not spend the whole summer on your games or social media…”

…she says, knowing full well she’s going to cave by Week Two just to get some quiet.

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☀️ “Go play outside!”

A classic. Delivered while sipping cold coffee, praying they don’t come back inside until they smell like grass and mistakes.

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🍕 “You’re hungry AGAIN?”

Didn’t we just have lunch? Like… 14 minutes ago? Are you a human or a raccoon at a buffet?

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🎭 “It’s not my job to entertain you.”

This isn’t Cirque du Soleil, and I'm not on tour. You have toys, a sibling, and an imagination—go forth.

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🧸 “There are kids who don’t even have toys…”

A direct quote from every mom who just stepped on a rogue LEGO barefoot.

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😒 “If you’re bored, I can give you a chore to do.”

And suddenly—miraculously—they’re not bored anymore. It’s a modern miracle.

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🥊 “Stop fighting. Stop yelling.”

Said while muttering “Jesus take the wheel” and wondering if 11 a.m. is technically too early for wine.

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🩲 “Whose underwear is this?”

It’s always somewhere it shouldn’t be: the kitchen, the car, the garden gnome. And no one ever claims it. Ever.

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🛑 “No, you can’t drag the trampoline over to the pool and jump off it.”

Welcome to Canadian backyard Jackass where the risk of broken bones is directly proportional to their boredom levels.

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So to all the moms out there riding the summer rollercoaster: you're not alone. You're strong, you're patient (ish), and you deserve a standing ovation—and probably a margarita.

Remember: There’s no epidural for summer, but there is drive-thru iced coffee and Wi-Fi that “accidentally” cuts out around 8 p.m. Stay strong, mama.